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On Being a Lightweight

I was doing a bit of soul-searching in a recent conversation, and the term "ego strength" was thrown out. Specifically, I do a real good job of talking confidently...

Of course, this isn't a new affliction among men; I call to mind the prophet Daniel's indictment of Belshazzar (oh yes, it's quite humorous sometimes what my mind retrieves). Remember the flannel graph from Sunday School? The handwriting on the wall? One of the prophecies was that Belshazzar's kingdom/reign "had been weighed in the balance and found wanting." My overly-simplified and more modern-day translation: "You're a lightweight," or perhaps, "All sizzle and no steak."

There are many life situations where I too bring energy, good intentions, and bluster...but I lack vision, stability, or perseverance. Internally, I had justified this as a momentary drift away from a solid core, but more recently I've been investigating the hypothesis that life has peeled back enough layers to reveal that the "foundation" wasn't nearly as solid (or as present) as I thought. Hence, the "ego strength" descriptor is especially a propos -- projecting confidence in a foundation that is either absent or woefully underdeveloped.

I'll be sure to do more thinking on that later - but that may create opportunities. Instead of trying to turn back the clock or reclaim that lost foundation, look forward to see what new possibilities I can create out of my current standing. Whereas the former depends on outside influences for happiness, moving forward requires forming an action plan to develop a solid foundation to match my well-formed sense of confidence.

You'll notice my last post (from 2009) circles around this issue...but with no real solutions. I'm actually trying out some different courses of action now and we'll see what sticks and makes sense in the coming weeks. It'll be much better if I can develop this core strength. Maybe that means doing lots of sit-ups...